How to turn Failures into Unstoppable Success
Saravanan Sivagnanam Failure, the moment we hear this word, we get the feeling of dejection and disappointment. Not many of us can take failure as a learning experience. If we want to live through failures and emerge successful, we need to know the meaning of failure, the reasons for failure and how to handle them.
Failure in simple terms is “Not meeting the Expectations”, be it the expectation set by others for you or the expectations you have set for yourself. Either way when you are not able to achieve the set expectations, you are said to have failed. This means you have failed in one particular activity and please do not assume that you are a total failure. And this is the first step towards overcoming failure. Now let’s look at the reasons for failure and how to handle them.
1. LACK OF EFFORT:
This is very common when you are forced to do something. When you are forced to do some activity, you lose interest in the activity and eventually you don’t give your 100% effort. The best solution for this problem is to talk to the concerned person about your dislike for the activity. This is just an issue of either convincing or getting convinced. If you are convincing enough you get to do the activity that interests you. On the other hand if you are getting convinced it means that you are interested in the activity you are engaged with, but you are either lazy or bored.
Now to avoid boredom and laziness, promise yourself a reward for completing the task on hand successfully. This will help you roll up your sleeves and get into action. Now in rewarding yourself follow the method adopted to train dolphins. First the dolphin is shown a fish to make it jump and it gets that. The second time you make it jump a little higher and only then it gets the fish. Now the third, fourth and fifth time it gets the fish, but the sixth and seventh it doesn’t get the fish and the eighth time it gets the fish and so on. So you create the uncertainty and the dolphin gets the message that if it jumps it has a fifty-fifty chance of getting the fish. If it jumps it might get the fish, if not it has to jump higher the next time to get the fish. The same principle applies to human beings as well.
2. LACK OF CONFIDENCE:
You might have given your 100% effort, but still may not succeed if you lack confidence. To get confident you need to believe in yourself; you need to develop positive thinking; you need to replace your negative thoughts with positive ones. This is called the Auto-Suggestion technique. Whenever you get the feeling that you are not confident, all you have to do is just tell yourself “I am Confident”, “I am full of enthusiasm”, “I am the right person to do this” and some more positive affirmations like what have been mentioned above. Anything you do over and again becomes a habit.
3. FIRST TIME SYNDROME:
Most of us have this, but in a varying degree. It’s inherent in human nature not to accept new things easily. So it’s quite normal that we get tensed and stressed when we are going to do something for the first time. The solution for this problem is to follow the simple technique called Visualization. Visualization means rehearsing in your mind, the activity that you are going to do for the first time, a number of times. So when you are actually doing the activity it wouldn’t be the first time.
4. UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS:
This may also be termed as over-confidence. You may not realize how big your goal is or how long it takes to achieve your goal. So halfway through you might feel you are not fit or cannot achieve the goal and you might even go to the extent of changing your goals. Please don’t do that.
There are two things you need to understand, the end goal and the process goals. The end goal is the ultimate thing that you want to achieve. The process goals are those, which help you, reach your end goal. Remember, always keep your end goal fixed and be flexible with regards to your process goals. Take a second look at your goals, break them into small parts and get into action. It shows how SMART you are, because being smart means setting goals that are Specific, Manageable, Attainable, Result oriented and Time bound.
Many a time we may not be able to change the way things happen, but surely we can change the way we react to the happenings. We came into this world not to just whine about things and pass away. Every one of our lives has a greater meaning and purpose. Whatever be it, we are here to succeed. And failure isn’t all that bad. So let’s take failure as a learning experience and become an unstoppable success. About the Author:
Saravanan Sivagnanam runs http://www.successdojo.com, the free success training center where he helps you achieve whatever you want to achieve. You will learn the principles of success, receive a customized success plan and the support needed to achieve your dreams. Copyright 2005 – www.successdojo.com
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